Are you sure Room 12 is ready?

What a beautiful day! I think it got up to 80 outside this afternoon. The kids actually were able to play outside after we got home. They really enjoyed playing catch with their Daddy, swinging and finally eating supper outside on the deck. I don't know about you but I'm ready to wear some shorts and flip flops. The question is,are YOU ready for me to wear shorts and flip flops? I am told, sunglasses are required in order to look at my legs! I am working on my tan at the 'fake and bake'. For all you who need a translation that's a tanning bed. I am so white, I've been twice and I've only used 11 minutes. I know right now you're thinking , "Where did I put my sunglasses?". Don't worry, I will not reveal them until they're ready. I was traumatized last year as I was trying to cover-up my whiteness at the "fake and bake". It was an ordinary day. I got off work and went to the tanning salon. When I arrived a little blonde girl took my number and marked my card. She said room 12 was available. As I approached the door to Room 12, I noticed it was closed. Now the first thing I'm thinkin' is "Somebody's in that room". I conveyed my concern to the young lady. She walked back to where I was and said "Oh, the air sometimes slams the doors shut on this side of the room". Right after she says that, she turns the door knob and pushes the door all the way open. SURPRISE, SURPRISE, SURPRISE. The bed was empty but the room was not. I never did see her face. Believe me, I would have rather seen her face. She was facing the wall in the 'buff' and I'm not through. She was bent over. At this point, the little girl ran back to the front of the place, in a panic, leaving the door wide open and me standing there with that "oh my goodness" look on my face. So at this point, this big girl, "me", runs to the back of the place. I guess the 'nude tanned lady' felt a draft because she turned around and slammed the door. Bless her heart. Judging by her skin tone, she was an experienced tanner and maybe even a charter member of this salon. Even in all her experience, I'm sure this day would be one she would not soon forget. I would say I haven't seen the lady since then, but I wouldn't know that now would I? But if I did and could ask her what she had learned from that experience I'm sure this would be her advice to us. 1. When you enter the tanning bed room, shut the door and push your entire body weight against it to make sure it is closed. 2. Then push the lock button really really hard. This step should leave the an impression in your finger tip (you don't want to take any chances) 3. Right before you get in the tanning bed, repeat 1 & 2. This has really helped in my recovery. After I complete all "3 steps", I can know that unless a fire breaks out in the next 5 minutes, I'm good!!

I know you are thankful that I do not have any photos to attach to this story. I think the picture you have in your head is enough.